Found this on another forum. Been kind of cracking up all day since reading it.
A cowboy from Wyoming appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter asked, "Have you ever done any deeds of particular merit?"
"Well, I can think of one," the cowboy offered. "On a trip to the Black Hills out in South Dakota, I came upon a gang of outlaw bikers who were threatening a young woman. I directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen. So I approached the largest and most tattooed biker and smacked him in the face, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the ground. Then I yelled, "Now, back off or I'll kick the ~censored~ out of all of you!"
St. Peter was certainly impressed, "When did this happen?" he asked.
"Couple of minutes ago." the cowboy replied