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Re:NEED A LAUGH? READ THIS ONE!
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TOPIC: Re:NEED A LAUGH? READ THIS ONE!
#207815
FINN (User)
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NEED A LAUGH? READ THIS ONE! 2 Years, 11 Months ago  
Now this is priceless!



So much for Weight Watchers...

Yesterday I was buying 2 large bags of Purina dog chow at Wal-Mart, for my dogs. I was about to check out when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think, that I had an elephant? Since I had little else to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time.

On the bright side though, I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes co ming out of every hole in my body and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was enthralled with my story by now.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food had poisoned me. I told her no; I had stopped in the middle of the parking lot to lick my ass and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard! WAL-MART won't let me shop there anymore
 
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#207827
Roadhammer (User)
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Re:NEED A LAUGH? READ THIS ONE! 2 Years, 11 Months ago  
THATS FUNNY!
 
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#207828
stanag (User)
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Re:NEED A LAUGH? READ THIS ONE! 2 Years, 11 Months ago  
I like it I wish that I was able to think that fast.

Stan
 
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#207846
IRISH (User)
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Re:NEED A LAUGH? READ THIS ONE! 2 Years, 11 Months ago  
isn't great to get 86*ed from a local store. Thats a good one!
 
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#207870
AKATIREGUY (User)
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Re:NEED A LAUGH? READ THIS ONE! 2 Years, 11 Months ago  
NICE....

Welcome to Wal-Mart
 
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SHINY SIDE UP
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#207897
FINN (User)
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Re:NEED A LAUGH? READ THIS ONE! 2 Years, 11 Months ago  
A FRIEND SENT THAT TO ME AND I THOUGHT WE COULD GET A GOOD LAUGH OUT OF IT.
 
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#207939
chico (User)
"EL BANDIDO" says lets ride man,lets ride!!!
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Re:NEED A LAUGH? READ THIS ONE! 2 Years, 11 Months ago  
My wife works at Wal-Mart at night,and she's gonna love this one!!!!! She says she gets some really wierd people in there sometimes!!!!!!!
 
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#207953
Capt.Kirk (User)
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Re:NEED A LAUGH? READ THIS ONE! 2 Years, 11 Months ago  
On my way to Wal-Mart right now. Didn't need any dog chow, but I might have to buy some!
 
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#207975
SPUDWRENCH12 (User)
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Re:NEED A LAUGH? READ THIS ONE! 2 Years, 11 Months ago  
that is a great story~!!! keep it up.
 
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#207999
Butter Bean (User)
As I shifted into 5th I forgot why she was nagging
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Re:NEED A LAUGH? READ THIS ONE! 2 Years, 11 Months ago  
How do you get kicked outta walmart, they accept everyone wow I like that one
 
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