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Re:Another Joke Thread 3 Years, 1 Month ago
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You do remember there are a couple women here, right?  we won't tell, promise. Unless of course your wives offer us chrome for our bikes!  |
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Re:Another Joke Thread 3 Years, 1 Month ago
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Last Edit: 2009/04/19 23:48 By Emu@Oz.
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Re:Another Joke Thread 3 Years, 1 Month ago
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Re:Another Joke Thread 3 Years, 1 Month ago
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 life is once enjoy it to the fullest! bbcode
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Re:Another Joke Thread 3 Years, 1 Month ago
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A genteel old Southern lady was driving across the Savannah River Bridge in Georgia one day. As she neared the top of the bridge, she noticed a young man fixin' to jump.
She stopped her car, rolled down the window and said, "Please don't jump, think of your dear mother and father."
He replied, "Mom and Dad are both dead; I'm going to jump."
She said, "Well, think of your wife and children."
He replied, "I'm not married and I don't have any kids."
She said, "Well, think of Robert E. Lee."
He replied, ''Who the hell is Robert E. Lee?''
She replied, ''Well bless your heart. You just go on ahead and jump, you dumb Yankee."
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Last Edit: 2009/04/20 14:37 By smhowse.
Reason: spelling
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Re:Another Joke Thread 3 Years, 1 Month ago
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HER DIARY:
Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a bar to have a drink. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment on it.
Conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn't say much.
I asked him what was wrong; he said, "Nothing." I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said he wasn't upset, that it had nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it.
On the way home, I told him that I loved him. He smiled slightly, and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior. I don't know why he didn't say, "I love you, too."
When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there quietly and watched TV. He continued to seem distant and absent.
Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes later, he came to bed. To my surprise, he responded to my caress and we made love. But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts were somewhere else.
He fell asleep--I cried. I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.
HIS DIARY:
Bike wouldn't start today, but at least I got laid.
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Re:Another Joke Thread 3 Years, 1 Month ago
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Free, personalized tra
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Re:Another Joke Thread 3 Years, 1 Month ago
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Re:Another Joke Thread 3 Years, 1 Month ago
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During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners, asked her students the following question:
"Michael if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?"
Michael said, "Just a minute I have to go pee." The teacher responded by saying, "That would be rude and impolite. What about you Sherman? How would you say it?"
Sherman said, "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back."
"That's better," the teacher said, "but it's still not very nice to say the word 'bathroom' at the dinner table. How about you, Edward? Can you show us your good manners?"
Edward replied, "I would say: 'Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope to introduce you to after dinner.'"
The teacher fainted. |
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Favoured: 1
ewwww
